The terror of love

27 December, 2024 - 06:02
=> { The time when I sent my last text, while watching my world shattering };

I realised I was holding it too hard that I could see the bruishes on my hands and the rope dripping my blood.
And, I'm trying to let go, my hands still open, to hold the last string, but I'm not crawling
I may try to grip it if it fell in my hands again, but I'm not crawling anymore
Ever heard of a string falling into your hands again and again? It never does, it's you trying to catch it, trying to hold it, not letting it go.
The stone you kick while going back home, that stone never comes to your leg, your leg goes to it to hit it.
Just like I didn't realise when somebody was kicking me over and over again, and I was stoping to wait for the same shoe, same kick, again.
Ever thought if that stone felt special, happy, cause somebody noticed it, again and again?
Cause it was too hard to differentiate between a kiss and a kick?
can both love and lie stay together? Or you just keep counting on which was more
Can you live comparing them both for the rest of your life? when the counting of lies never coming to an end
Can you act like you're too naive to understand it and play dumb for the rest?
When it's pricking your heart with each word leaving his tongue.
A time comes when the lines of your hands starts to disappear, the grip goes nill, and the rope you're holding will slide off.
Would you expect the rope to swim back to you and lay in your hand? No, It never will,
Do you think the rope was in love? It simply cannot.
Just like a few human beings, it feels like they're with you, cause you're holding them,
leave the grip, and watch them leave, they won't look back, YOU will
You will turn back to see all the thing you did, the way you bled, the way you yelled, cried, while ploughing your grave.
You will turn back and see the way they left you while you were dying on the floor, ignored you when you crying for help
You may try to forget the words, but will your heart ever forget how it felt? To be abandoned
To be the one being cheated on and being cheated with at the same time. Will your heard ever forget the pain it sufferred
Will you see the love with the same eyes again, the spark in your eyes will never come back, the terror of being in love will kill you everyday
And when you'll see two souls in love, you'll feel bad for them. The failed love will flash back in your eye,
And, the terror will come, terror of loving with all your heart, and giving all you had.
As somebody said, the punishment of loving too hard is to never loving again.




The terror of love creates a permanent resistance of being loved